Growing In Patient Endurance

Experiencing Humility

The Lord and King is the Holy One of Israel. He says, “You will find peace and rest when you turn away from your sins and depend on me. You will receive the strength you need when you stay calm and trust in me. But you do not want to do what I tell you to. Isaiah 30:15 NIRV

Incurable Restlessness

Restlessness. It is experienced most between where I am going and where I have been. Restlessness creates a divide between me and God’s peace. My heart is divided. I want something, He has not given me and I want it now, I want to know what is ahead. Change came, God gave light for my next steps and now I wait for the rest of the revelation to unfold. God has shut off the passion for where I was, He has shown me where I am going, but in this gap between the two, I find an incurable restlessness, that brings my soul to tears of frustration and furthers the divide between me and God’s peace.

O Timothy, guard and keep the deposit entrusted [to you]! Turn away from the irreverent babble and godless chatter, with the vain and empty and worldly phrases, and the subtleties and the contradictions in what is falsely called knowledge and spiritual illumination. 1 Timothy 6:20

Developing Patient Endurance

I can see ahead how God is shaping things up with a vagueness that keeps me on my knees. I know now that He rescued us from something that was coming, something we would never have anticipated and He is positioning us for a new God Adventure. The hardest part for me is waiting. How do I rest in the waiting when I only see in part and the rest is all conjecture in my mind? My mind plays a key role in developing patient endurance. I have to learn where the shut off valve of my mind is and I need to learn to use it, especially when it is flooded with presupposition that tries to figure out what is ahead. Only God knows. I silently submit to Him, letting go of my expectations, letting God work it all out.

More Of The Same

It is harder to deal with the “more of the same” from the last life season, when God has answered and there is a way out, but He has not quite opened the door all the way yet. This gap I find myself in is underlined in a deep soul restlessness, one like I have never felt before. It is probably cultivated by the enemy of my soul as a joy distraction. I should be joyful and be rejoicing in what God has done. God has moved in a mighty way for us, yet I am soul restless. I know God is using this transitional time for my good, to teach me an experiential patient endurance. This does makes me smile, because God knows me like no other and I don’t like change and He is truly changing things up.

Remember the long road on which the Lord your God led you during these forty years in the desert so he could humble you, testing you to find out what was in your heart: whether you would keep his commandments or not.  He humbled you by making you hungry and then feeding you the manna that neither you nor your ancestors had ever experienced, so he could teach you that people don’t live on bread alone. No, they live based on whatever the Lord says. Deuteronomy 8:2-3 Common English Bible

Pride Is Inflexible

My heart was inflexible and that was not good in the season of a huge life change ahead of me, which has been put on hold for the next six weeks. I must learn to navigate this transitional time, me the one who hates change. The restlessness does distract me, so I need to start there and begin applying the Word of God to it. Meditating on God’s Word, getting it into my heart has really helped divert the restlessness, so I can begin developing a patient endurance, which is under-girded by an enlarged trust from a stretched faith. I have found that faith does not stretch when pride is present, pride is inflexible and sets up my soul in stubbornness.

Doing what is right will bring peace and rest. When my people do that, they will stay calm and trust in the Lord forever. Isaiah 32:17 New International Reader’s Version

Humility Lifts Up Respect

God has unmasked my heart, so I now see clearly that my restlessness is set up by pride and when my arrogance rises and roars, upsetting my soul, I need to bow my will. My will does have a tendency of bucking up during transitional times. To clearly, with a pure clarity, undefiled by personal bias, see what is ahead, my will needs to be bowed. I can see that God uses restlessness for my good, because the only way out of a lifted-up soul restlessness is down, bowing before God. Humility is amazingly powerful and it is in this heart position that reverence rises, respect lifts up and restlessness is put face down.

“You will keep in perfect and constant peace the one whose mind is steadfast [that is, committed and focused on You—in both inclination and character], Because he trusts and takes refuge in You [with hope and confident expectation]. Isaiah 26:3 Amplified Bible

A Divided Heart

A divided heart is a restless soul. In a transition time, the gap between what was and what will be, will naturally in our human condition, be a disliked time. Transitional times in our life seasons are a time for self-control and a time we wisely don’t follow after our emotions. When God is only showing so much and wants us to trust Him, as He goes before us and makes a way for us, our emotions are shook up and our faith gets stretched. When we can’t see our next step ahead, yet God has push forward our vision, we will either submit to God’s way of doing things, or we will try to figure it out with speculation, assumption, presupposition and presumption. All these things have one thing in common, they are a false and dangerous to entertain because they can create a fake reality. When we think on assumptions from the father of lies, this is our schemer’s delight, and our mind becomes his favorite playground.

The weapons of our warfare are not physical [weapons of flesh and blood]. Our weapons are divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses.  We are destroying sophisticated arguments and every exalted and proud thing that sets itself up against the [true] knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought and purpose captive to the obedience of Christ, 2 Corinthians 10:4-5 Amplified Bible

A Lie Bought

I bought into a lie that I have no purpose. I am in a transitional time, and I “feel” a lack of purpose, my feelings are not necessarily truth. This is not true, God’s purposes are always in play in my life, it is a huge part of His Providential care of me. Now, as I wait for the new to unfold, I see my God purpose less clearly. The enemy screams into my mind: “You have no purpose.” I have allowed these deceptive thoughts to remain and develop into a thought patterns that are God opposite, creating an atmosphere for falsity of thought to prevail in my mind. This bad choice ushered in the very restlessness I am soul saturated with right now. My responsibility was to take captive these thoughts at the get go because they did not line up with God’s truth and way. I can see now as God reveals to me that our soul restlessness is based on the developing of a false narrative in our mind, which can lead to a created reality that is utterly fake. We have been set up for fake news from the enemy of our soul to distract from the good news of the Gospel. This false narrative leads to a fake reality and upsets us and leads us to act wrongly out of the negative issues it has stirred in our hearts. Restlessness grows in this kind of mind atmosphere where everything is conjecture and the giver of such inference, is the enemy of our soul who loves to create a circle of unending restlessness in us that divides our hearts between a worldly viewpoint and a kingdom perspective. Restlessness tears your soul apart creating an undivided heart.

Eternal One, guide me along Your path so that I will live in Your truth. Unite my divided heart so that I will fear Your great name. Psalm 86:11 The Voice

But He gives us more and more grace [through the power of the Holy Spirit to defy sin and live an obedient life that reflects both our faith and our gratitude for our salvation]. Therefore, it says, “God is opposed to the proud and haughty, but [continually] gives the gift of grace to the humble [who turn away from self-righteousness].” So submit to [the authority of] God. Resist the devil [stand firm against him] and he will flee from you. Come close to God [with a contrite heart] and He will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; and purify your [unfaithful] hearts, you double-minded [people]. Be miserable and grieve and weep [over your sin]. Let your [foolish] laughter be turned to mourning and your [reckless] joy to gloom. 10 Humble yourselves [with an attitude of repentance and insignificance] in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you [He will lift you up, He will give you purpose]. James 4:6-10 Amplified Bible

I Want To Know

We have to let go of our “wanting to know” and develop a patient endurance with God, an enlarged trust that lets God work at His speed and in His way. Humility is key and this is established in us as we bow before God, letting go of our will and submitting wholly-holy to Him. Surrender of all things us develops a heart of undivided loyalty to all things God and it is in this humble position we are showered with His Grace that dead ends soul restlessness. Who would have thought that humble, holy-wholly surrender is the best resistance to the enemy? This seems meek, but it is powerful, the human condition under God’s control is influential. Restlessness is an inner pride and resistance is a bowed humility. When we resist, we bow and the enemy flees, because the Presence and Power of God is so very close to a heart humbly-submissively surrendered to God.

And he gives grace generously. As the Scriptures say, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world. Let there be tears for what you have done. Let there be sorrow and deep grief. Let there be sadness instead of laughter, and gloom instead of joy. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honor. James 4:6-10 New Living Translation

Growing Spiritually Is Joyful

As I continue to grow in the spiritual discipline of patient endurance, restlessness is a tactic of the enemy that he will continue to deploy to try to distract and derail me. If, I stay humble in spirit, this restlessness will have no power over me. I have further learned a new way to guard my heart and that is to set my mind with the selflessness of Jesus, shape my will by the powerful wisdom in His Living Word and set my soul attitude with the humility and meekness of our Precious Savior. Jesus came to us, in the flesh, to die our death, so we could live in the power of His life, His Spirit and His Word. Restlessness be gone in the name of Jesus, this is a new day and Kingdom joy has broken through.

Philippians 2:5-8 In other words, adopt the mind-set of Jesus the Anointed. Live with His attitude in your hearts. Remember: Though He was in the form of God, He chose not to cling to equality with God; But He poured Himself out to fill a vessel brand new; a servant in form and a man indeed. The very likeness of humanity, He humbled Himself, obedient to death—a merciless death on the cross! The Voice

I hope you enjoyed this nourishing meal of Patient Endurance posted at the Author Table of The Bridegroom’s Café. This meal has a very personal flavor, it gives you an insight into the life of the Author, KimberlyMac, me and all I am growing through. I hope you share it on all your Social Media accounts and bless someone else with the wisdom of Patient Endurance. God bless you. Much! PS. I highly suggest you check out my book: The Bridegroom’s Voice, it will bless your life in ways no other book has.